Disaster Movie is a 2008 American comedy film written and directed by Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, and stars Matt Lanter, Vanessa Lachey (née Minnillo), Gary "G Thang" Johnson, Crista Flanagan, Ike Barinholtz and Kim Kardashian. The film grossed $34.8 million dollars on a $20 million budget and it was a critical and commercial failure. With a 1% on Rotten Tomatoes, a 1.9/10 on IMDb, and a 15% on Metacritic, it is not only considered as the worst film made by Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, but as one of the worst films of all time. This film, along with Meet the Spartans was nominated for the Razzie Award for Worst Picture, but lost to Mike Myers' The Love Guru (which this film also parodied.)
"Will, Lisa, and two of their friends attempt to flee man-made and natural disasters and encounter Batman, Hancock, The Hulk, Indiana Jones, Hannah Montana, Michael Jackson, Beowulf, the Love Guru, Iron Man, rabid chipmunks amongst others in their seemingly vain efforts to seek help and shelter from unknown threats."- Description from IMDb
A bunch of random people start to be plauged with stupid disasters and try to get away from them, and encounter many rip-off characters along the way.
The film begins in 10,001 B.C., a caveman (Matt Lanter) is seen running away from a mammoth, who squashes him. He keeps running until he encounters Wolf (Ike Barinholtz) and gets into a fight with him. He manages to defeat him, sees a reptilian-like creature's eye and stars to run away. The creature then turns out to be a gasoline-drinking saber-toothed Amy Winehouse (Nicole Parker), who takes her MackBook, goes to "Facenook", and informs him that on August 29, 2008, the world will end and their fate lies on the Crystal Skull (which is actually an orange-colored skull). The caveman starts to scream.
The sequence turns out to be a nightmare that Will (Lanter) was having as we cut to the present. Will wakes up and is sleeping with his girlfriend Amy (Vanessa Minnillo), who turns out to be having an affair with Flavor Flav. She takes with Jo-Jo with her after Will doesn't admitt his true feelings for her and she says that she won't go his "Super Duper Sweet Sixteen" birthday party at his house because he's 25. He responds by saying that he never had one before she leaves. At Will's "Super Duper Sweet Sixteen" party, we meet a girl who flashes her hairy breasts to Will, Dr. Phil, Will's best friend Calvin, Anton Chigurgh (Barinholtz), and Calvin's girlfriend Lisa Taylor (Kim Kardashian). Then, Seth and "McLover" trying to steal beers. Lisa wrestles with The Beautiful Assassin (Carmen Electra). After a long fight, she hires Calvin to shoot the assassin, but he accidentally shoots at Dr. Phil, causing Seth and McLover to get scared. He tries to shoot at her again, but this time he accidentally shoots at Chigurgh, causing Seth and McLover to get even scared. The assassin says that she curved the bullet and Calvin finally shoots at her, causing Seth and McLover to leave the party.
Then we cut to Juney (Crista Flanagan), Paulie, who are talking about selling babies on "uPay". Amy arrives with her new boyfriend, a Calvin Klein underwear model. After the High School Musical kids, Jessica Simpson (Parker) and J.T. sing, the room shakes and the lights go out. A bulletin from the radio reports that something has jolted the city. The underwear model is scared and thinks he and the others are gonna die. Will asks Amy why she brought another guy with her and she responds by saying that everytime he made love, she was thinking about another guy. When the bulletin reports that there's a meteor shower and a Pinkberry has been destroyed, everyone evacuates. Outside, everyone's running away. Will, Calvin, Lisa, and Juney find that a meteor has hit Hannah Montana (Flanagan), who wakes up, saying goodbye to all her fans before fainting. After she wakes up for the fifth time, her blonde wig falls out, revealing that she truly is Miley Cyrus. A kid tries to wake up a drunken Hancock to save the world, but Hancocks slaps him. He wakes up and gets hit in the head by a pole, passing out. The city starts to freeze over and they retreat to a garage for shelter, where they meet the characters from Sex and the City. Juney fights and defeats Carrie Bradshaw. She explains that the calamities are caused by global warming and Will realizes that the dream he was having about Amy Winehouse could be related.
Then, Will has a dream where he's a Jumper and tells Amy that he can teleport through time to space. Prince Caspian (Barinholtz) comes in and says "I am Prince Caspian, here to save Narnia" as Will falls into his sword. He identifies Will as "the guy who ruined Star Wars" (Hayden Christensen). Will screams as he wakes up and his friends tell him that they saw his dream. They chide him for not commiting himself to his relationship with Amy and when the room starts shaking, they leave the garage. A policeman (Barinholtz) tells the people to keep moving as many of them get crushed by meteors. Will gets a call from Amy, who's at a museum and he admits that he loves her. He can't hear her while she's talking as the call is dropped and she leaves. He decides to rescue her, but Calvin tells him that he shouldn't or else he would die. Lisa then gets crushed by a meteor, killing her. While the other comfort Calvin, the Enchanted Princess (Parker) climbs out and gets ran over by a taxicab. Calvin immediately falls in love with her and she tells them that she has consuming lots and lots of enchanting drugs. Later on, the princess' pimp, Prince Edwin comes in and challenges Calvin into a dance fight.
When a tornado appears, Edwin flees and hides in the sewer hole, and tells Calvin that the princess is all his. Iron Man appears to fight the natural disaster and says "I am Iron Man" before getting knocked down by a cow thrown by the tornado, turning him into a tin can. Hellboy (Barinholtz) appears, gets knocked by another cow, and leaves. Then a man appears, saying that the tornado is making him angry, so he transforms into the Hulk. His pants are ripped off and he gets hit by yet another cow. Amy calls Will, saying that an Egyptian statue fell on her during the earthquake, and Will says that he'll save her, but she cannot hear him. They find shelter and Calvin gets a phone call on his shoe phone from Lisa's mother, who is informed about Lisa's demise and how Calvin has found the princess. They encounter three singing Chipmunks, who turn out to have rabies and attacking the gang. They start feeding on Juney's back until she presumably dies and Will and Calvin trap the Chipmunks in a garbage can, suffocating them to death.
After a parody of the "Head On" commercial, they go outside where many people are evacuating, including Batman (Barinholtz), who informs them they must evacuate in buses and that there will be no chance of survival if they go to save Amy. Learning that 5:30 pm is closer to 9 than he thought, he throws a grappling hook, which then accidentally lands on a car that drags him away while he was talking to the princess. With time against them, the princess shoots several times at Speed Racer, so they hijack his Mach Five. They hear someone say "hee-hee", so they check the trunk.
Inside the trunk is Michael Jackson, Chim-Chim, and Spritle. They drive to the Natural History Museum and get there, where they save Amy, who informs them that they Crystal Skull from Will's nightmare is the only thing that can prevent the end of the world. Calvin and the princess try to get out, but find out that the museum doors are closed and all artifacts have come alive. When Will and Amy run to put the Crystal Skull on the altar, they encounter a nude Beowulf (Barinholtz), who keeps saying "I am Beowulf" and Will makes gay jokes about him. Meanwhile, Calvin and the princess comfront Kung Fu Panda, who slaps the princess. Calvin fights and defeats him. When Calvin and the princess kiss each other, Calvin accidentally pulls out her wig, reaviling that she is actually a man in drag. Kung Fu Panda takes out a katana and kills both of them. While Will fights Beowulf, Amy takes an axe and stabs Beowulf in the back, killing him.
They run into the altar where they meet Will's father: Indiana Jones (Tony Cox). He tries to put the Crystal Skull on the altar, but has an accident. Will does it instead, and everything goes back to normal. The film ends with a wedding ceremony for Will and Amy being performed by "The Guru Shitka" and an extensive musical number about some (not all) of the characters dating each other, ending with the Chipmunks who are then crushed by a cow. Then, the credits start rolling.
Why it Sucks
- It's filled to the brim with gross-out jokes, racist jokes, sex jokes and fart jokes.
- All the cameos in this movie aren't funny in any way, shape or form.
- Awful acting that can even ruin a somewhat funny scene.
- Mindless gags that just take from some popular film of 2007 or 2008.
- Many unknown actors with the exceptions of Carmen Electra, Vannesa Minnillo and Kim Kardashian, but they all still suck anyway (See Reason 4)
- Awful editing that makes no sense. For example in one scene a character gets a facial cut but in the next scene it disappears with no explanation.
- Too many pop-culture references and movie trailers that it makes fun of.
- The jokes are just AWFUL. In one scene, the Amy Winehouse parody starts burping and doesn't stop for a very, VERY long time. (It's even longer in the Unrated Cut)
- This film should have ended the duo's career, but its "modest" success meant even more films from them that are just AWFUL!
- Some really stupid ideas including rabid chipmunks who are a parody of Alvin and the Chipmunks and an evil Kung Fu Panda, who is a ripoff of the movie of the same name.
- The ending is just AWFUL, but we'll leave it alone for the fact you will cheer in joy once you know the movie has finally ended.
- Abysmal songs, including one about getting an abortion and another one about how dating is basically sex.
- The fanbase that still uphold and defend these movies are the reason we keep on getting these turd movies.
- Kim Kardashian is in it. Need we say more?
- Poor special effects. For example, when the Enchanted Princess is shooting Speed Racer repeatedly with a glock, you can see that the slide on her pistol doesn't move.
- In one scene where Juney and Paulie are talking, both Facebook and eBay are referred by their actual names, even though they are shown with parody names on screen (Facenook and uPay).
- It's showed us that now ANYONE can make a successful spoof movie without putting any effort into it.
- They have chosen a good name for the film... WHICH PERFECTLY DESCRIBES THIS MOVIE!
- 10,000 BC (2008)
- American Gladiators (2008)
- Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008)
- Flavor of Love (2006-2008)
- My Super Sweet 16 (2005-2008)
- Superbad (2007)
- Wanted (2008)
- No Country for Old Men (2007)
- Juno (2007)
- High School Musical (2006)
- Cloverfield (2008)
- The Day After Tomorrow (2004)
- Hannah Montana (2006-2011)
- Hancock (2008)
- Sex and the City (1998-2004)
- Sex and the City (2008)
- You Don't Mess with the Zohan (2008)
- Jumper (2008)
- The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian (2008)
- Enchanted (2007)
- Step Up 2: The Streets (2008)
- Twister (1996)
- Iron Man (2008)
- Hellboy (2004)
- The Incredible Hulk (2008)
- Alvin and the Chipmunks (2007)
- Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me
- The Shining (1980)
- Head On (Commercial)
- The Dark Knight (2008)
- Speed Racer (2008)
- Night at the Museum (2006)
- Beowulf (2007)
- Kung Fu Panda (2008)
- The Love Guru (2008)
The film grossed over $34.8 million against a budget of $20 million.
The film was universally and heavily panned when it came out. On Rotten Tomatoes, the film has a 1% approval rating based on 71 reviews with an average rating of 1.3/10. The site's critical consensus says "Returning to their seemingly bottomless well of flatulence humor, racial stereotypes, and stale pop culture gags, Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer have produced what is arguably their worst movie yet." The movie also has a 1.9/10 on IMDb, and for a brief period of time topped the 100 lowest rated movies on that site. It also has a 15% on Metacritic based on 12 critics.
The film got nominated for six Razzie Awards (Worst Picture for Friedberg and Seltzer, Worst Supporting Actress for Electra, Worst Supporting Actress for Kardashian, Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-off or Sequel, Worst Director for Friedberg and Seltzer, and Worst Screenplay for Friedberg and Seltzer), but all lost to The Love Guru, Repo! The Genetic Opera, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, 1968 Tunnel Rats, In the Name of the King, and Postal.